"Where is home for you?" I've been asked this question throughout my life, but find the question being asked even more since becoming a missionary. It's simple enough, but surprisingly tricky to answer. I usually end up asking a few clarifying questions "Do you mean... Where did I grow up? Where do I live most of the time? Where am I living right now? Or where do I enjoy being the most?" As a strange look comes across their faces I tell them, "I'm a missionary." Their response is, "Ohhhh" and I can tell they are usually thinking, "You are weird!"
For Stephanie and I, we usually say Lebanon, IN is home. Both our parents live within 20 minutes, it's the center of most our supporting churches and it's where our children have grown up (at least the stateside). In the past two years, I've heard our kids say "We're home!" in at least eight different places: 1. our house in Abengourou, Ivory Coast, 2. the house at the Lebanon Christian Church, 3. Stephanie's parents' house, 4. my parents' house, 5. the Baptist Guesthouse in Abidjan, Ivory Coast, 6. the SIL Guesthouse in Abidjan, 7. a hotel in Tennessee and 8. a hotel in West Virgina. For them "home" is a relative term. Home is whereever Mom and Dad are tonight.
Home is about having roots- a sense of belonging and an identity to a specific place. For a missionary home often partially describes a number of places, but none fully embrace its meaning. On the field there is a sense of "this is where we should be... where God has called us." Yet, we struggle to identify the host culture as our own, wading through differences in beliefs, values and mind-sets. Though we might be accepted and loved, we are still seen as outsiders. "Back-home" we navigate our culture with much greater ease, yet it's not quite the same place we once left. It also lacks the sense of belonging (i.e. this is where we should be). For our kids, it can be especially difficult because they haven't grown up in our host culture either. They have a sort of culture of their own somewhere in the middle.
So, how do you establish roots for your family (especially for your children) while your address constantly changes? The key is where you're placing your roots. The Bible tells us, "I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge--that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God." (Ephesians 3:16-19 NIV *emphasis added) We must be rooted not to a place in this world, but to the love of God. God’s word teaches us that we "live in the world,” but are not to be of this world. (2 Corinthians 10:3) Just as home for our kids is whereever Mom and Dad are, our home is where our Father dwells.
For us, home finds its roots in the love, connection and sense of belonging and togetherness of our family. Whether we are in Ivory Coast, Africa; Lebanon, Indiana; or some hotel for the night we can be home dwelling in the love of our Father in heaven. Someday, we will end our wanderings and ever-changing address and head to our real home where Jesus is preparing a permanent dwelling place for us (John 14:2). Then, we will be able to truly say, "We're home!"
